Its been a while since i been on here, busy week, still frustrated beyond words by the fact that i couldnt find a fricken job this summer and have been looking since MARCH@A#@#*^%&**&&( grrrr. today was a decent day, cleaned my room (well a continuation of what i did two weeks ago, still have a lot more to do) did my last load of laundry ( I have WAYYYY too many clothes, anyone wanna buy some off of me???) and braided my hair, nicely, its been a while, did julia's hair decently, i gotta break her in, slowly, ease her into the tighter braids, dont wanna hurt girlie. the cook out for ruth and liz's birthday. it was nice, i saw the girl that i think i might like a little bit, and other noticed she might be *interested* he he. go me, go me. so as ive said before i have two girls in mind, that i might decide which one i wanna try to go for. im not greedy, so i wont try to do the both thing, hopefully i pic the right one. he he. i cried alot today, I really miss Caryn. everything reminds me of her. its still so hard to believe that the funeral i went to, was for her, that the only thing i have of her is memories and pictures. a wave of sadness hits me at the most random times. ay, here i go again, sad again. i want a cuddle buddy NSA cuddle buddy, which is a no strings attached cuddle buddy. someone who doesnt like sleepin alone, but doesnt want to get involved kinda person, well not just person, but a female. Puifai ordered Harry potter book 6 and it comes in tomorrow. she said i could read it if i wanted too, but she bought it, so she has the right to read it first, im patient with things like that, and I would be grateful that she would let me read it when she is done. Thanks puif, even though u dont have this thing, it was a very nice thing for you to offer.

O Today I also started making up lists of foods that the girls can use to create a New menu for this upcoming fall. I am running for our houses kitchen manager, and I have SOOOO many ideas and plans, and right now im in the process of laying them out, because im going to be ready for this election, i sat out for a semester, and i watched the other two managers at work, or lack there of...but it was a time to sit back and watch and observe. And now its time to act. SO if you are running against me, GOOD LUCK. That kitchen is disgusting, embarrassing and I plan on changing that. Unfortunately I cant change how some of these girls were raised. WHo the Hell Puts FOOD in a GOT DAMN SINK?>???>>>??? COME ON. O also these girls, not all but some or one is very manner-less. WHY would you eat someone elses Food, its very rude. and your STEALING from your own sister. ay ya yai. we are a great sorority, dont Fuck it up by doing stupid shit, your embarrassing yourself, and us. its pathetic, if you dont have money, talk to us, we'll help you, its what we do. And sammy jo if your sleep eating hunni lol, we'll lock u in ur room no worries.

Yea i havent talked in a while, so here, im making up for it. Im going to bed, sulking and thinking and dreaming, for The best things in life remain unseen. Thats why we close our eyes to kiss, to cry, to dream ... How i wish I could close my eyes, and see my best friend before me, so i can tell her how much she means to me, and how much i so badly want her back. life is too short for some, and unfair to most. it is truly ashame how things happen that are unexpected. especially when they arent for the better. there is nothing and no one that can convince me that it was her time to go. and that everything will be ok.

Today Rosa said she was going to kill me *jokingly* and I said not so jokingly "well maybe i can see my best friend again"